The Long Con
They're determined to keep me here until I die, but I won't do it. They're gonna to blink first.
The judge died ages ago. Pounded his gavel and lectured me. Threw 265 years my way to think about what I done. Rest in peace, you bastard, I'm still here.
It hasn't been easy livin' this long, prison is tough. They didn't make none too easy at first, tellin' the other prisoners what I was in for.
"Got ourselves a rapist and murderer here. Thinks he's real tough, picking on girls."
Taylor thought he was gonna get the best of me. Thought he was gonnag to turn the tables on me, make me his prison bitch. I put'em in the ground real quick, got me another 20 tacked on my sentence for my trouble.
I ain't gonna sit here and tell you that I don't deserve to rot in this prison until my sentence is served. I done some horrible things. Ain't no one left to apologize to these days 'bout it though, they're all dead too. Mothers, fathers, sisters, nieces. All pushin' up daisies. Don't matter much anyhow, I ain't all that sorry.
Nowadays, they just leave me alone. Tried to force their way in to run all kinds of tests on me a while back. Tried to find out why I ain't dead yet. Some wet-behind-the-ears lawyer told them to beat it. Sure do miss that kid, smart as whip. Heard he died of Alzheimer's about 60 years ago.
"It ain't no secret anyways," I told 'em during one of the hearing. "I ain't dead because my sentence ain't up yet. You told me I was gonna die in prison, and I'm gonna prove you wrong."
I saw a few of 'em laugh, most of them are dead now. Might be one or two of 'em left, bein' wheeled around in some nursin' home with a few screws loose.
Had me on the news for the longest time. "Medical miracle" they called me. Other folks paraded around the prison demanding my release on account of me bein' old. Ain't none of them remembered what I done. Now the news don't bother anymore. Suppose they'll be waitin' outside the door when they let me go.
I don't look a day over 80, and I still feel fit as a fiddle. First time I started havin' aches and pains, I done decided I was just gonna stop until my time was up. My body takes care of the rest. It knows me too well, I wouldn't put up with it not listenin' to what I want.
My memory and my mind are still sharp. Why, just a few years ago I sat down with a new guard and told him all about his great-great-great granpappy who guarded me. Been through more guards than I can count, plenty of wardens. Hell, I've outlasted three of the prison buildings.
But tomorrow, tomorrow is gonna be different. I ain't been scared for a minute of the 308 years I've been on this Earth. But tomorrow scares me. My sentence is up. I done served my time and they gonna cut me loose.
Don't know what's out there really. Don't know a soul. Crazy shit I ain't ever seen up close.
They tried to get me to take some kinda counselin' or some nonsense to get me ready to go out there. Seemed kind of stupid, if you ask me. Figure the state's already wasted enough money on me.
I asked 'em for the bill, ya know, food and board for my time in here. Told 'em I might just decide to live long enough to pay it all back. Ain't lost my sense of humor after all these years either.
I wish they'd just let me stay. Can't rightfully stay alive after I done kept my promise. I figure Death will be waitin' right behind the news cameras for me.
Ain't nobody feelin' sorry for me, though. I've done had a long while to get myself ready for livin' on the outside. Been puttin' it off, now it's here. But I ain't gonna be free. It's gonna be more like a prison than this place ever been. I'll be hounded day and night by doctors and reporters, people wantin' to know my secret.
Well I do got a secret for them. Gonna kill the first person I see on the outside and get myself right the hell back in here.
Can't die as long as I'm in prison.
The judge died ages ago. Pounded his gavel and lectured me. Threw 265 years my way to think about what I done. Rest in peace, you bastard, I'm still here.
It hasn't been easy livin' this long, prison is tough. They didn't make none too easy at first, tellin' the other prisoners what I was in for.
"Got ourselves a rapist and murderer here. Thinks he's real tough, picking on girls."
Taylor thought he was gonna get the best of me. Thought he was gonnag to turn the tables on me, make me his prison bitch. I put'em in the ground real quick, got me another 20 tacked on my sentence for my trouble.
I ain't gonna sit here and tell you that I don't deserve to rot in this prison until my sentence is served. I done some horrible things. Ain't no one left to apologize to these days 'bout it though, they're all dead too. Mothers, fathers, sisters, nieces. All pushin' up daisies. Don't matter much anyhow, I ain't all that sorry.
Nowadays, they just leave me alone. Tried to force their way in to run all kinds of tests on me a while back. Tried to find out why I ain't dead yet. Some wet-behind-the-ears lawyer told them to beat it. Sure do miss that kid, smart as whip. Heard he died of Alzheimer's about 60 years ago.
"It ain't no secret anyways," I told 'em during one of the hearing. "I ain't dead because my sentence ain't up yet. You told me I was gonna die in prison, and I'm gonna prove you wrong."
I saw a few of 'em laugh, most of them are dead now. Might be one or two of 'em left, bein' wheeled around in some nursin' home with a few screws loose.
Had me on the news for the longest time. "Medical miracle" they called me. Other folks paraded around the prison demanding my release on account of me bein' old. Ain't none of them remembered what I done. Now the news don't bother anymore. Suppose they'll be waitin' outside the door when they let me go.
I don't look a day over 80, and I still feel fit as a fiddle. First time I started havin' aches and pains, I done decided I was just gonna stop until my time was up. My body takes care of the rest. It knows me too well, I wouldn't put up with it not listenin' to what I want.
My memory and my mind are still sharp. Why, just a few years ago I sat down with a new guard and told him all about his great-great-great granpappy who guarded me. Been through more guards than I can count, plenty of wardens. Hell, I've outlasted three of the prison buildings.
But tomorrow, tomorrow is gonna be different. I ain't been scared for a minute of the 308 years I've been on this Earth. But tomorrow scares me. My sentence is up. I done served my time and they gonna cut me loose.
Don't know what's out there really. Don't know a soul. Crazy shit I ain't ever seen up close.
They tried to get me to take some kinda counselin' or some nonsense to get me ready to go out there. Seemed kind of stupid, if you ask me. Figure the state's already wasted enough money on me.
I asked 'em for the bill, ya know, food and board for my time in here. Told 'em I might just decide to live long enough to pay it all back. Ain't lost my sense of humor after all these years either.
I wish they'd just let me stay. Can't rightfully stay alive after I done kept my promise. I figure Death will be waitin' right behind the news cameras for me.
Ain't nobody feelin' sorry for me, though. I've done had a long while to get myself ready for livin' on the outside. Been puttin' it off, now it's here. But I ain't gonna be free. It's gonna be more like a prison than this place ever been. I'll be hounded day and night by doctors and reporters, people wantin' to know my secret.
Well I do got a secret for them. Gonna kill the first person I see on the outside and get myself right the hell back in here.
Can't die as long as I'm in prison.